Awesome stuff... or randomstuff you could put it like that.

When I Was 7, Hannah Montana Was That's So Raven, I-Carly Was Drake & Josh,Justin Bieber Was Jesse Mccartney, Lady Gaga Was Britney Spears, Wizards Of Waverly Place Was Phill Of The Future, And Spongebob.. Is STILL Spongebob(;

Edward: " I could kill you in seconds. So shutup. "
Jacob: " what are you gonna do exactly? Sparkle me to death?!"

''Hmm... I'm gonna make some toast.''
*puts bread in toaster
*waiting and more waiting... getting bored.. waiting...
''I'm ready, it's gonna come up anytime soon. I wont get scared. (thinking in head)''
*bread suddenly comes up
You: SUPER HEART ATTACK

A black man walks to a bar. a white man says: "colored people are not allowed in here." the black man says: "when i'm born i'm black; when i'm cold i'm black; when i'm sick i'm black and when i'm dead i'm black! but when you're born you're pink; when you're cold you're blue; when you're sick you're green and when you're dead you're purple! yet you have the nerve to call me colored?!"